Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Thanksgiving Skit - Axe and You Shall Receive

I couldn't find a good Thanksgiving skit, so I decided to make one up. Feel free to use this skit and if you do, let me know how it went. Just please remember to give credit where credit is do. God bless. 

A good verse to read at the beginning is:
 Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. ~ I Thessalonians 5:16-18

Axe and You Shall Receive
Written by Anna R. Tobey

             Turkey 1
             Turkey 2
             Turkey 3
             As many other turkeys as you like. They are all background turkeys and don't have speaking parts,   they just make turkey noises.

             Handkerchief  for Pilgrim to blow his nose
             Some leaves for turkeys to forage

Stage Set Up:  This skit takes place in the woods where a Pilgrim is hunting turkeys with an axe to celebrate Thanksgiving dinner. 

Left side of Stage: Turkeys gathered together in group. All are foraging and making silly turkey noises. The extra axes are hidden behind the group of turkeys.

Right side of Stage: Pilgrim walks slowly towards the turkeys. He is holding his axe high ready to strike. Make this part suspenseful taking one step at a time very slowly.

Pilgrim: (accidentally sneezes) Ahhhh Ahhhh Ahhhh Chooooooooo!

Turkeys immediately stop making noise and look towards pilgrim

Pilgrim: (sheepishly) ohhhh ummm hello!?!

Turkeys are all staring silently, just blinking

Pilgrim: Uhh . . . . What a beautiful fall day! Don’t ya think?

Turkeys continue to stare. One of them finally answers.

Turkey 1: What are doing here?

Pilgrim: Nothing. What are YOU doing here?

Turkey 1: (sarcastically) Foraging

Pilgrim: Great! I hope you guys have been eating a lot!

Turkey 2: Why?

Pilgrim: Oh no, um, no reason. It’s just good to be fat!

Turkey 2: Why?

Pilgrim: Umm, gee, I don’t know. Just cuz. You know, just in case you need to feed someone.

Turkey 3: That doesn’t make any sense

Pilgrim: (yells in excitement) It does for me!

Turkey 3: What?!

Pilgrim: Nothing, nothing. Can you guys turn around?

Turkey 2: Why?

Pilgrim: Because you’re just so cute and I can’t do this if you’re looking at me!

Turkey 2: Do what?

Pilgrim: (Yelling) KILL YOU!!

All Turkeys: GASP!! (one faints)

Turkey 1: (surprised)You want to kill . . . .us?

Pilgrim: YES!

Turkey 2: But . . . but, why? (fainted turkey gets up)

Pilgrim: Because I want to eat you!

ALL Turkeys: GASP!! (same turkey faints again)

Turkey 2: But . . . but why?

Pilgrim: Because it’s Thanksgiving and that is what we do!

Turkey 1: What is Thanksgiving?

Pilgrim: (sighs) It’s a time when we remember to tell God what we are thankful for.

Turkey 1: What does that have to do with us?

Pilgrim: I don’t know. It’s only once a year. Come on! Turn around!

Turkey 3: (disbelievingly and shaking his head) So you are only thankful . . . ONCE . . . a . . . year?

Pilgrim: Well, um. No. I mean, yes. I mean, I don’t know.

Turkeys: (all turkeys begin making disapproving noise) tsk tsk tsk

Turkey 1: (scorning) And you kill a turkey as a sacrifice to your once-a-year-thankfulness. I would figure that God (pointing to Heaven) doesn’t like to be thanked only once a year.

Turkeys: (turkeys begin making disapproving noises again) one yells out “AMEN!!”

Turkey 2: Maybe you need to think about this more. Look at us, we are thankful EVERYDAY to God. (Pilgrim looks down in shame)

Turkey 3: He provides for our food (Pilgrims slumps more)

Turkey 2: Our shelter (Pilgrim slumps more)

Turkey 1: Our baby chicks (Pilgrim slumps to his knees)

Turkey 3: (righteously) Thankfulness is what we do everyday, not just once a year.

Turkey 1: And we certainly don’t KILL anything to celebrate our thankfulness.

Pilgrim: (still on his knees, covers his face and begins crying and loudly speaking) You’re right! All of you!! I’m sorry little fat turkeys! Only once a year do I celebrate with thanksgiving. (determined, blows his nose, and stands up) I will go home today and count my blessings. God blesses me EVERYDAY and I’ve never even thanked Him.

Turkey 2: Don’t worry little Pilgrim. God is a forgiving God. Go home and love Him

Pilgrim: (sniffing) Can . . .can I get a hug?

Turkey 1: Of course! (smiling and opens arms wide) (then seriously) Just put the axe down first

(Pilgrim puts axe down and then goes over to hug Turkey 1)

Pilgrim: (begins to cry hysterically)

Turkey 1: (petting the pilgrim’s head) There, there. Don’t worry about it.

Pilgrim: I am so ungrateful

Turkey 1: Yes, yes you are, now go and make things right with God

Pilgim: I will little fat turkey. (looking to the sky) I will.

(Pilgrim runs jubilantly towards the exit)

(short pause, Turkey 1 goes over to pick up axe)

Turkey 1: (turns around and faces the turkeys) Works every time! (Turkeys separate to reveal a stack of axes.Turkey 1 goes over and places the extra axe on the stack)

Turkeys: (start making their turkey noises again)